'As tough as wanting something can be ... the people who suffer the most are those who don't know exactly what they want...' or so says Meredith ...
Have you ever lain on snow, full length, limbs sprawled ? I have...
Its a great feeling...
Staring up at the dark night sky, from a white bed of snow, and just lay there... feel the bite of the snow, let the chill penetrate the skin and reach my bones, till they go numb ... and there is no cold,no pain, nothing.
We desire a lot of things, want some of them , but just don't need them all, at least not all the time. But the thing we cannot live without, is our existense, the thing that defines who we are. It can be anything, our poetry, our parents, our kids, our car.... it can be anything. But it means so much to us that we know we will not be able to identify ourselves without it. And when it gets hurt, it hurts us. Sometimes breaks us.
We can forget about our unmet desires, can manage without our wants, can compromise without our needs but we stop surviving without our being.
It feels like falling into the water.... first we try to swim, to stay afloat and then after some time, the fight within us runs out. We try to find our happy place. We want someone to pull us out, someone to fight for us, someone to know us, to understand our being. And when we don't find that happy place, and when the person doesn't find us, we let the water inside us and there is blue everywhere. The sunlight moves further away as we keep getting pulled inside, waiting to save our being.
Have you ever lain on snow, full length, limbs sprawled ? I have...
Its a great feeling...
Staring up at the dark night sky, from a white bed of snow, and just lay there... feel the bite of the snow, let the chill penetrate the skin and reach my bones, till they go numb ... and there is no cold,no pain, nothing.
We desire a lot of things, want some of them , but just don't need them all, at least not all the time. But the thing we cannot live without, is our existense, the thing that defines who we are. It can be anything, our poetry, our parents, our kids, our car.... it can be anything. But it means so much to us that we know we will not be able to identify ourselves without it. And when it gets hurt, it hurts us. Sometimes breaks us.
We can forget about our unmet desires, can manage without our wants, can compromise without our needs but we stop surviving without our being.
It feels like falling into the water.... first we try to swim, to stay afloat and then after some time, the fight within us runs out. We try to find our happy place. We want someone to pull us out, someone to fight for us, someone to know us, to understand our being. And when we don't find that happy place, and when the person doesn't find us, we let the water inside us and there is blue everywhere. The sunlight moves further away as we keep getting pulled inside, waiting to save our being.
